The week will end on a stronger note than it began. I've managed to finish one revision of an old poem that actually has a place in the new manuscript -- in the myth section -- and this morning I found a scrap in my old journal that made its way into being an actual poem for the fable (pig poems!) section. Of course, time will be the real test and may prove that these pieces don't belong anywhere near the MS -- the sow poem in particular, since I'd considered that section pretty much finished. But right now I'm optimistic, which is nice change from the beginning of the week and my last post, eh?

The 27th of October is mid-semester at the college, (and my sister's birthday!) which will mean that my sabbatical will be halfway over at the beginning of November. If I'd kept to the original schedule I set out for myself, the MS would have been complete in September and I'd be immersed in writing my play right now.

I can't tell if my efforts to write part -- no, most -- of the book manuscript in meter are more a matter of self-sabotage or truly a worthy challenge that will develop my skill level/craft and result in personal growth. (Wow, did THAT sentence sound like a load of crap, or what? Personal growth? I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. I sound like a guidance counselor. Wonderful.) I guess what I'm trying to say is that the professional and personal importance of the sabbatical is a pretty heavy weight on my shoulders right now -- I feel this need to know if I'm making the right decisions, because I feel like a misstep could be disastrous.

But, really, will it be disastrous? Maybe. I promised the sabbatical committee (and myself, which should be more important) a complete manuscript and a full-length play when I return to school to January. I'm frightened by the thought that if I'm only -- roughly -- halfway through the book manuscript at this point, it will likely take me another one to two months to complete the damn thing. That leaves one month to hash out a play manuscript -- 70 pages of metered verse, in dialogue.

What the eff have I done?

And to add to my self-inflicted stress, I have two independent study students from last semester who are waiting for a response for me about their final projects/manuscripts, and I just realized I haven't communicated with either in about six weeks. Yikes. Guess what I'm going to be doing later today?



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